Commit to your Dream

It's been a week since I last checked in and I find myself on another early Sunday morning chronicling the events of the past week and looking toward the next week and the goals to be reached in my journey of preparation to create the Spirited Raven Energy Cooperative.

First, let me state for the record, that I am more and more convinced - and commited to this venture. Its viability, its purpose, its vital importance are solidifying before me each and every day. The shape of what I will present to people molds itself into a more refined shape each day. The strategy of how to go about this process - this act of creating - is becoming clearer, sharper and more readily grasped each day.

In part, this confirmation is a function of something that harkens to a quote given to me by my friend Rob not too long ago. Unfortunately, I can't find the actual words but the gist of it is about the magical, unforeseen things that unfold and present themselves to you when you commit to something. When you embrace a dream and begin to walk the path of that dream, all sorts of switches are flipped into the ON position. You are receptive to the messages and the Universe is turning its gaze to you and delivering the people, resources, energy, creativity, Love, imagination and perseverance you need to make that journey.

I am on that path with amazingly powerful conviction and Beauty beginning to unfold before me. The unknowns become swept of their fears when you abandon the uncertainty that restrains your stride forward. I've often likened it to the scene in that third Indiana Jones movie wheen Indy is forced to have faith and step out, literally, into a bottomless abyss as he's seeking to cross over to the other side and reach the holy grail in the hopes of saving his father who lies dying from a gun-shot wound. It's all hokey Hollywood, but the essence of the act is there in technicolor. He grasps his heart with hand, closes his eyes, takes a deep breath and commits. No turning back. His leg swings out over the yawning gap with purpose and courage. He is about to plunge to his otherwise certain death. Instead, his foot lands with a thud on a previously invisible bridge of stone that will convey him to the other side. Hindsight is so easy at that point. But prior to that, he had to have a fearlessness that was willing to embrace Death willingly. An abandonment of Self and a commitment to Faith is what guides the truest of journeys.

That is the fearlessness I must possess. This is the time to make this my consciousness; my reality. I have this Life to live and I have this opportunity to be FEARLESS. I am going to give to it ALL I have and let it take me wherevever the Spirit cares to convey me.

Today is going to be my little creative sketching session. I'm heading to the office to spread out across the conference table and literally sketch onto paper as many slides as I can to create an outline and format for a presentation that can be adapted to address various types of audiences and circumstances. I want to incorporate themes of Peak Oil, the history of ethanol, the process of ethanol production, the practical layout of a cooperative organization, flowcharts of the inputs and through-puts of the cooperative, etc.

I anticipate developinng as many as 50 or 60 slide formats that should be able to be drawn from to create customized presentations from short-and-sweet five minute pitches to full-on hour-long lectures.

Since last week, true to the nature of what I'd anticipated, the only person involved in the act of cooperative ethanol production - Damon Knutson at Green Energy Network - has responded with positive contribution of information and aid. I've written him and set up a time to talk on Monday. If we do, in fact, speak, it'll likely turn out to be a great bit of helpful information about the mechanics of getting people on board with an Energy Cooperative like the one I'm creating.

Still no word back from Stephanie Scheck in Ithaca. I don't want to dismiss ANYONE for a lack of responsiveness or participation. People are on different paths and their directions may not be coincident all the time. That may be the case now with her and her group of interested ethanol supporters but it may not be in the future and I want to be inclusive and open and giving and kind. This isn't about ME; it's about creating something Beautiful and enduring and strong and regenerative and healing. I'll patiently keep knocking at the door :)

The same goes for David Blume and the ACBAG forum. A lack of participation or communication by them doesn't lend to dismissal out of hand. It draws a comparison to my attitude of getting the word out to people and convincing people of why participating in this Cooperative will be a good idea: I don't need to convince the entire country or millions of people of the legitimacy - I only need to make it happen with a few thousand (to begin with anyhow!). Heck, for what it's worth, that sale only needs to made to a couple hundred people in the first year. That's what I concentrate on - that's what I do. So too it goes with the ACBAG group. I don't need the full participation of every bloody person. I only need to be patient and persistent and seek out the true kernels of knowledge that remain after the chaff is long since blown away...

The business plan has taken a new stride this week as well. I had a great conversation with Rob about my dreams and goals. He spoke with FIRE about what he is creating and his interest in having me participate. We spoke frankly about what I'm seeking to achieve and maintaining good communication about what energy I could bring to him and what he would, in turn, offer up. I am convinced, there is a GREAT DEAL of common ground in our respective dreams and I'm extremely stoked about the imagination that find things being build in those Commons!

I want to close with a couple links that are of importance that I've come across this week and have burrowed in to me:

Post Peak Living:
http://www.postpeakliving.com/

Soil - a grassroots organization that had/has been helping people in Haiti to solve two big problems - sanitation and soil fertility. The solution being humanure - excrement composting.
It doesn't hurt that I think I've fallen in love with their founder and leader - Sasha Kramer! :)
http://www.oursoil.org/

Lastly, the amazing therapautic work of Stanislov Grof and his holotropic breathwork that helps people to emerge from traumatic issues buried deep in their unconscious selves. Opening people to what he calls non-ordinary states of being/reality. It is incredibly important and meaningful work from what I've learned of it.
http://www.holotropic.com/

That's about it for now. I'll be back soon. Gotta fly...

Winnowing & Strategizing

OK, there's basically two things I'd like to get into words. One is that I'm boggled at the notion that people can express an interest in doing something they're convinced is "good" or "right" or "necessary" or whatever and then not actually follow through with the simple, day-to-day process of communicating and moving forward with that thing, whatever it may be. More on this in a bit. The second is that I've come to recognize that there is what amounts to about 3 months' time remaining for me to work here in New Orleans and after that, it's bite the bullet time. Move back to New York with little or no money in hand, little or no prospect for immediate employment, BUT have a Plan. And a man with a Plan is a wonderful thing! The plan, of course, is to establish the Spirited Raven Energy Coop. To wit, I have embarked on the process of developing the essential presentation of the Business Plan. Time is of the essence. I have only a few short months to get this done, have it polished and packaged and ready to launch when I return. I have to begin NOW.

Back to the first point. On a practical level, I've been making efforts to do two things in the past couple weeks. The first has been to communicate more openly with the people who'd solicited David Blume to come to Ithaca and deliver his Ethanol Workshop this past September. I was directed to one of these folks and she earnestly seems willing to help me get integrated with their group. The frustrating thing, however, has been the near-total lack of follow-through. Everyone's always gung-ho at first and then things fizzle. And I mean quick! The same holds true in the second case in point: The Alcohol Can Be A Gas (ACBAG) member forum. Now, this is supposed to be a group of people who are self-described enthusiasts about ethanol and are either interested in it for intellectual/hobby reasons or are, like me, interested in pursuing this as a real community scaled fuel making venture. Given that assumption, you'd think my repeated pleas for feedback on who's doing cooperatives in other parts of the country would render at least a morsel of information! To date the only person I've managed to find who's actually doing this in the same sense that I've been describing to myself and others is the only person who's actually been responsive to my inquiries and furnished some good feedback.

And therein lie the lesson. Like so much else in life, there must be a winnowing of the grain from the chaff. There are those who espouse and profess to be "into" some thing or another but are, in fact, only observers. The vast majority are spectators. There aren't really that many players on the field. And you know what? That's just fine by me. The less people who actually want to pull this cart through the mud means there's that much more room for the likes of me to actually see this through without the competition of others. They'll gladly hand the reins over to me and say "Drive this buggy, bro!" Giddy up.

As for the Business Plan. A few things to be mentioned in brief as notes about what's been learned. Keep it brief. If the presentation is to be done in PowerPoint, it should not exceed 10-12 slides. K.I.S.S. as the Old Man used to say... There are different audiences and differing circumstances with differing time limitations. The number of people being sold on the subject at a given time may be widely variable. The bottom line is ALWAYS BE CLOSING. Regardless of whether it's a single person or a stadium full, the intent is to make the sale.

Oh, you didn't realize that was what we're doing here? Selling? That is EXACTLY what we're doing. We are selling an idea and we are gaining the trust and INVESTMENT of people in this enterprise. I must make the sale and follow through with the goods. This is the essence of what this is all about. Making a sale and following through with the goods. Make the sale and follow through with the goods!! DEFINE that and DO that.

The marching orders for me this week are as follows: Correspond with the gentleman from Sonoma County who's actually doing a cooperative and has bothered to write me back with information and enthusiasm AND produce a draft story-board of the KISS version of the PP presentation of the Spirited Raven business plan. Also, I'll take some time assembling more web-found photos for a gallery of images to draw on.

Rock on!

Frozen Pipes & Rising Oceans

Well, it's gotten a bit nippy down here in Camp Swampy - aka New Orleans. Seems the entire Gulf South has gotten a taste of some serious cold weather lately. With the arrival of this cold weather, of all the things to mull over, the one that never ceases to amaze me most is the fact that people persist in leaving water pipes and other freezing-prone items exposed down here despite knowing that EVERY year the temperatures are going to fall below freezing. So, instead, we run the faucets all over the house all day and night and hope a pipe doesn't blast open from the irresistable forces exerted by freezing water. There's something to all that. There's something to the fact that people, knowing something is inevitably going to happen - a matter of when, not if - continue to refuse to do a damned thing about it and only RE-act versus acting (pardon the term) pre-emptively. There's something to this whole notion of what makes so-called 'economic' sense to people. Cost/benefit, risk analysis. I guess it all falls under headings such as those. It's just not worth the time and effort to make those changes or incur the added costs of insulating pipes that are only at risk perhaps a few days of every year.

Insurance companies, despite being the vile, pillaging scum they are in most instances, tend to be pretty good about monetizing the impacts of our decisions (insulate the exterior pipes and you'll avoid busted pipes and the cost of repairs to not only the pipes but anything else the now liberated water may have (severely) damaged OR pay an additional amount to said insurance company in the form of premiums to cover the distributed risk of assuming responsibility for repairing those uninsulated pipes and all the other crap that got soaked when the water sprayed it sopping wet during the wee hours of that cold, cold winter night while you slept soundly dreaming of large, well rounded women (not that I ever have that dream, mind you!).

As it turns out, there's a good deal to be learned about the rationale and logic of human cost-benefit analysis from the way in which insurance companies calculate risk. A calculation that they then, in turn, pass along to people in the form of higher and (if only rarely) lower premiums. As a result, we could then extrapolate out this line of thinking to consider how such risk is being monetized by insurance companies to determine whether they have factored the subject - and implications - of climate change into their calculus and passed those anticipated risks on to customers. If so, the potentially potent positive feedback loop created by this sequence of cost impacts may lead to a net effect of decreasing the incidence of behaviours that promote climate change.

Or would it?

In fact, no. Let's go back to my uninsulated pipe for a moment. Effectively, that pipe represents, let's say, the ocean (stay with me here). The house is Earth, Mr. Homeowner is the world's population, yada yada yada... On a planetary scale, insurance companies aren't rewarding or discouraging behavior that may cause/prevent the pipe from popping open. Instead, they're looking at only the risk involved in setting your kid's science fair award winning paper-mache' rendition of Mount Aetna (I couldn't resist mis-spelling it and pulling in the insurance company tie-in, hehehe) beneath that burst-prone pipe. Why? Because stowing it there will undoubtedly, at some point or another, lead to it becoming a bleary, soggy mess of cellulose on damp plywood that was once Sicily!

Insurance companies are only a canary in the coal mine, not the tollman at the bridge. They are reflecting the recognition of increased risk of activities associated with the EFFECTS of climate change, but are not tempering or inhibiting the CAUSES of it: Principally, the belching out in vast quantities carbon emitted as a byproduct of the combustion of oil and coal. Those people stepping on to those planes to go from Pasadena to Providence are not incurring an added cost to their trip that is a function of the risks fostering accelerated climate change and the mind-boggling effects that will have on planetary life as we've grown accustomed to it. But, in fact, that is precisely where (among others) the costs should be levied. It would discourage the use of air travel, which is one of the most profound culprits in this equation of carbon emissions, and foster more climate friendly travel (or discourage travel, altogether).

The same goes for the coal fired electricity generating station or the oil rig located off the coast of Nigeria or that cute, copper-colored Acura SUV or the 3,700 square foot retirement home built on the exurb frontier of Atlanta or... You get the idea. If innsurance companies were responsible for cleaning up the mess created by these activities, cumulatively - and it is going to be a big mess, mind you - then they'd be weighing the contributing effect of these respective activities and charging higher premiums accordingly. But they're not. They're not because that's not their job. They are only watching the water rise and ensuring you've rolled your pant legs sufficiently high enough up to avoid having to pay your dry-cleaning bills should they get wet by those rising waters. Preventing the burst water pipe, rising waters, decimation of entire ecosystems, extinction of whole orders of plant and animal life, starvation of potentially billions of people, etc., is the provenance of another mechanism; another body.

How does that risk get calculated? How does it get monetized? How does it get passed on?

And, perhaps, just as importantly: Is this a role for Government?

I'll leave that for another time.

Catching Up & New Contacts

Well, it's been a couple days since I was last on. This due, primarily, to the fact that I was exhausted last night and managed to fall asleep on the couch on about 7:30 and barely roused myself at 5:00 this morning to get my dragging ass off to the gym. Managed to do it, though.

I've taken to doing something as of the last few days that I'd resisted for reasons that are too convoluted and involved to explain here. I began to pray again. I got down on my knees on Sunday night, knelt at the side of my bed and, after having offered what I considered to be the requisite apologies for my long-time silence, began to pray for the help I need in so many areas.

Lately, those areas requiring assistance include the perseverance to keep getting up at bloody 4:30 or 5:00 every morning, preparing myself for the day ahead and getting to the gym for what is shaping up to be a really amazing - and amazingly challenging - training program. Already, I've begun to transform and the results are encouraging. The obverse side of that coin being, though, that it tends to send wave upon wave of urges to sleep at the end of the day to convelesce from the manic cellular activities raging inside me. The factory is going full tilt and all it wants is for me to give it a chance to hunker down for a peace. Up I get, though, and on to the next day's challenges. Sie la vie...

The other item that is begging for the assistence of The Spirit is the course my life's work is now taking. I am embarking on what I know will be the vocation that will engage me for a great deal of whatever is left of this body's time on the planet. As it stands, currently, I will (barring early dismissal from my current employ) be packing my things here in New Orleans and heading back HOME sometime in early May (right after Jazz Fest! - hey, you gotta have your priorities in order!). So, it'll be back to my family and in the company of people that I share a common vision of the purpose, intention and vision of life. I have been readying for that journey with what I would like to consider measured and purposeful doses.

The past few days have provided a few good in-roads:
1.) Contact with one of the people who'd spear-headed the efforts to organize and help realize the recent (Sept. '09) David Blume ethanol workshop in Ithaca. Currently, the level of contact has been restricted to a few emails, but I suspect we'll be speaking in detail very soon.

2.) I've been corresponding with a really helpful gentleman - Damon Knutson - who's heading up a grassroots ethanol operation in Sonoma County wine country of California (very similar to the vineyard strewn and winery laden Finger Lakes of NY) and gaining insights about their operation. He's graciously offered help with information about operations, equipment needs, etc. A good resource, undoubtedly. Their cooperative's website: http://greenenergynetwork.org/pages/welcome.htm

3.) Another interesting recent contact has been with Steve Spence of The Green Trust (http://www.green-trust.org/) which is a clearinghouse and resource for alternative technologies and sustainable, independent living. Steve introduced me to a wonderful new avenue of learning in the form of AQUAPONICS - small-scale fish culture and vegetable growing. The gentleman he was working with is an obviously good-hearted, Christian man who's made his design plans available for free to anyone. Great stuff. Raising fish for food and using the nitrogenous byproducts of their excretions to nourish soil-less vegetable gardening. It has to be seen to be believed! Really ingenious stuff!! Check it out: http://www.fastonline.org/ Go to the technologies page and sniff out the barrel aquaponics manual... It'll amaze you.

This is all I've got energy to offer up tonight. I gotta hit the rack and get some shut-eye!

The Point of No Return

It's a chilly Sunday morning here in New Orleans, Louisiana - 3 January, 2010

A number of years back, I'd set off across the country on the back of an old BMW motorcycle on what I called my Spirit Journey. It was a sort of walk-about that I'd undertaken to step as fearlessly into the unknown as I possibly could and confront those fears, greet them and put them aside, one by one. That journey led me to New Orleans in a very round about way and I eventually ended up being employed in the business of building very large yachts for extremely wealthy people. It was a very strange turn of events for me. And as the years have slipped by, I've held on to that sense of fearlessness but only by the faintest threads some times.

The recent willingness on my part to abandon the murky fears that have held me back in the more recent past has opened the doors of my Heart to something that I would never have experienced. When those doors open, one is exposed to a grand new vista that you were previously blind to seeing.

Such is the case of my willingness to commit to my dream of creating this Energy Cooperative. It is the culmination of everything that I have been training myself for over these past 25 or so years. I have given little back to others in these years. Now is the time to create that thing of enduring Beauty that others will appreciate - as my personal slogan goes. NOW is the time to embark on the journey perilous that will set me, in the company of those I Love and my fellow community, on a path that builds something strong, enduring and life giving.

This isn't about hope. Hope is a lie. This is about being present in what we are doing at this very moment. It's a tricky proposition because it seems to connote that you can not look into the future. That is not so. One can, and should, plan. Preparedness is mindfulness. Planning for the things that are intended to transpire is not the same as residing in that fictitious future at the expense of being present in the hear-and-now. With that, the planning for these things that are to be built has commenced. I will, today, graphically (since that is the way in which I best work) outline the rudiments of what this process will be. I will enter it into this blog when I've sketched it out. Effectively, the whos and the wheres and the whats of this thing I'm calling Spirited Raven Energy Cooperative. If it is manifested in the imagination - planned for - it will take shape in this shade of consciousness we like to call Reality.

In closing today's entry, I submit one of the more powerfully articulated thoughts on the subject of committment that I've read in a long time. It was sent to me by the dear friend to whom I'd written the letter that I excerpted and created yesterday's "Ethanol Ramble" blog. Read it and then read it again. Slowly.

It follows:

Until one is committed there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness. Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation) there is only one elementary truth, the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans; that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then providence moves too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole steam of events issues from a decision, raising in ones favor all manor of unforeseen incidents and meetings and material assistance, which no man could have dreamed would have come his way.

- Goethe

Ethanol Ramble...

This is an excerpt from a letter I just sent off to a close friend, fleshing out the bones of this business/life venture I'm embarking on and creating:

Hey Brother! Things are congealing for me over here. I've begun a blog to journal daily the progress in creating an energy cooperative. I've basically come to the final conclusion that it's back to Ithaca that I must come in the Spring after this last boat pulls away from the dock for the last time. Honestly, I don't know what exactly I'm going to do to make ends meet while this is coming together, but I'm setting fear aside and staying present with everything except the forward planning and goal-setting.

I've given myself goals to achieve in the first year, such as agreements struck with participating farmers (or wineries) for feedstock, a minimum number of coop members (I've arbitrarily set it at 200 for now), having a real site and facilities set up to actually make alcohol and, again arbitrarily, set a minimum production goal of 1000 gallons. Just as importantly, having a goal for finding a market for the co-products of distillation (otherwise known as distillers grains) is going to be a loop-closing goal that will top off the list of achievements for the first year.

Besides being something I believe in whole-heartedly, I'm increasingly convinced this is going to be a vital service that people will rely upon as a necessity. We have a real storm approaching with converging fronts. Re-localizing energy production, doing it in a way that is sustainable in a climate neutral (or arguably having a positive effect on climate and air quality), environmentally rehabilitative way that also generates what I call "cascading" enterprises that mandate non-exportable good jobs is fundamental bedrock business stuff!

These marketable ventures that are downstream from the actual distillation of the alcohol are only limited by imagination and the willingness to create connections - not to mention that they're far more lucrative than the distillation of the ethanol at the beginning of the process. For example, when the alcohol is distilled, it leaves behind distillers grains in solution which, at it's simplest, is a great feed for livestock (far more nutritious than the original grain/seed because now the difficult to digest starches have been removed - converted to alcohol - leaving behind a high protein, high fat, nutrient rich meal that lends readily to healthy growth in farm beasties. Likewise, the distillers grains can be simply turned back into the soil as a supplement/fertilizer that is being increasingly regarded as having amazing impacts on improving microbiological structures in the soil and improving not only the fertility of the soil, but also the defensiveness of the soil and plants to pathogens and insect damage.

Speaking of insect damage, another co-product of alcohol distillation is CO2. If collected at the time of fermentation, it can be injected into well-contained greenhouse spaces, creating a positive air pressure that drives plants wild and virtually eliminates the presence of insects. Another area is the creation of mycelium colonies from distillation co-products and growing marketable mushrooms.

Likewise, another area that is very lucrative is in aqua-culture; farm grown fish, besides fetching higher and higher prices, yield very lucrative fertilizers derived from their remains and their poop.

That leads me into composting... But I'll save that for another installment!

I'm excited about this, bro. This is something that is burning inside me like a flame not unlike that flame my Dad used to talk about having in his belly. I never knew that feeling until I commited my Heart to this. It's the right thing to do and it's the kind of thing I can create to leave behind something that will be a legacy - I'll have contributed something positive and beautiful in this paltry life of mine. And that ain't bad :)

Peace!

A Very Fine Place To Start

The beginning, that is. I'm going to make this my DAILY journal location.

For the record:
1.) I am chronicling the creation of my Community Supported Energy Cooperative. For now, I've named it Spirited Raven Energy Cooperative - that's subject to change.

2.) I am publicly stating that I will in one year's time have accomplished the following:
*Moved back to upstate NY and established agreements with farmers for the acquisition of their feedstock for making alcohol.
*Have acquired a base of no less than 200 people as founding members of the SREC
*Identified and, as necessary, leased (or purchased) a site on which to distill alcohol and process co-products
*I WILL HAVE DISTILLED NO LESS THAN ONE THOUSAND GALLONS OF FUEL GRADE ETHANOL
*Have identified at least two follow-on "cascade" enterprises for business creation

3.) I am also chronicling my physical, mental and spiritual progress as a man by doing the following:
*Commiting to a goal by mid-April of having lost 20 pounds of fat and gained 6 pounds of muscle. My current weight is approx. 235 lbs. My final weight should, therefore, be approx. 220 lbs.
*Commit to performing yoga one day each week.

4.) Financially, I am using this blog to follow my progress in budgeting what is sure to be a chaotic and bizarre set of records for the coming year. Do my monthly budgeting and be faithful to saving money as often as possible.

Well, that's enough pronouncements for one day. Check in tomorrow.